Monday, November 23, 2009

The World Stood Still

My oldest brother Jim Bradshaw, "Browski," died last weekend, Saturday the 14th of November, 2009. He was the pilot of a life flight helicopter which malfunctioned and went down outside of Reno killing him and the two medics aboard.

My world stood still when my parents called to tell me the news. I thought it was a joke, even had to look up the story, to see his name in print to know the truth. I also had a strong, almost magnetic feeling that I needed to be with my family. I couldn't help but call all of my siblings. I wanted to have Dave with me. I wanted to check to see if Carson was okay, I wanted to touch everyone and cry together and feel safe. I wanted to get rid of the nagging anxious feeling I had.

I just returned from Browski's memorial service. It was good to hear my Dad and brothers share stories about time spent with Jim. I know they agonized over how to relay their feelings and they were amazing. I learned that all of the men in my family are the same in their kindness and hospitality, and in their concern for showing you a good time when you visit them in their homes. And I know that all of them have such big hearts and so much love to give.

After the service the family and close friends joined at my parents' house. The place was packed, it was unbelieveable the amount of friends who came to show their support, all these people who came for my Mom, came to meet my family, came to grieve together. Somewhere in the evening Linus shared a photo tribute to Browski and the room filled in with people sitting everywhere to see pictures of my goofy faced brother and the life and times he had. At that moment the world stood still once again. Two groups of people so incredibly different, there to share in the memory of my brother. Jenn said it right, "it was like world peace there in that room."

I don't know why Jim's helicopter crashed, I'm trying not to dwell on the details of it all. I know that accidents happen and that sometimes we don't get as much time here as we hope to have. I know that there is a spirit who comforts us in times of sorrow such as this. Comfort and peace are the prayers sent up in a time such as this and I have felt strengthened because of the those offered on my behalf. I know I have a Heavenly Father who loves me, I know that. I can feel his love all around me, even in simple things when I stop to take notice. I know that God places people in our lives to laugh with us, and at times like this, to cry with us too. I also know that my family will not be the same without Browski, but that we will pull through. Most importantly, I know that I will see that mug again.

The world stood still, but it will go on.

20 comments:

House of Jensen said...

I am so sorry to hear the news. It's awful when something happens like that. I have lost two of my brothers and though it was a long time ago and I don't remember much I do know that it was there time and that they are always here looking out for me and my family. So have hope and faith and remember that he probably had fulfilled his mission here and has another one to fulfill on the other side.

Kenton and Haylee said...

I'm so sorry Wendy. I can't imagine losing a sibling. I lost a friend a couple months ago and that was hard enough. If you need someone to talk to, I'm here. Let me know if you and your family need anything at all. Thank goodness for our knowledge of the gospel and eternal families. How would we ever cope without it? You're family is in our thoughts and prayers. Love you guys!

Rich and Tyra said...

Oh I am so sorry to hear this. It is so hard and shocking when something like this happens so close to you. I hope that you are doing ok and our prayers are definetly with you.

Anonymous said...

Hi Wendy, So sorry to hear of this terrible accident. Your mom gave me your blog address some time ago so I could "check-in on the grandkids". I have enjoyed reading your blog from time to time and love your personality. I don't imagine that you would remember me from back in good ol' Morgan Hill days, but I remember you and your family and am praying for you guys at this difficult time. (PS Your children are adorable!) Danell Cline

Cody and Sharice said...

Oh Wendy I am so sorry for your loss. Please let us know if you need anything. Our prayers are with you and your family.

Holly Goodman said...

I knew something must be wrong from the way you sounded when I called to see if you were going to Jazzercise last week. Becca told me what happened I think and I saw you leaving town. I'm so sorry, but glad you had an opportunity to be with all your family and that it was a neat experience to see the support and friendships your brother had.

Anonymous said...

Wendy, I am so sorry for your loss. I wish that I could have been with the family in this time of need. My thoughts and prayers are with all of you.
-Cousin Jaime
rabid.viking@gmail.com

Christine said...

I love you and admire your strength during this time of trial. I wish like heck I could have just given you a big hug and cried with you. I'm happy the family could all get together and share happy memories of that goof-ball. :) Hang in there. I love and miss you! :)

Maxwell Family said...

I'm so sorry for the pain your family is suffering at the loss of your big brother. Our prayers and thoughts are with ALL the Bradshaws. What a great support system you have...FAMILY! Love The Maxwell Family

Kaila said...

That is so sad Wendy. I wish I knew what else to say. It breaks my heart when things like that happen.

Amy W said...

Virtual hug. So sorry Wendy...I can't imagine. It sounds like your family is amazing and so supportive. Loves!

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Mel said...

I am so sorry Wendy. I hope you were able to spend some time with your family. I guess you know, I lost a brother too.. You will be ok... it still hurts (10 years later) but it isn't as hard anymore. You have a wonderful hubby and beautiful kids to keep your spirits up! Will be praying for you.

chenoa said...

I am so sorry for your family's loss, Wendy. Glad you found some comfort and peace.

Blackburns said...

I just read your blog and I am so sorry for your loss. I can't even imagine. I hope you are continuing to feel peace and comfort.
Love,
Kim

Noah Evslin said...

Wendy, I didn't meet you at your parent's house the day of Browski's funeral, but my wife and I were there (we are Browski and Linus's friends from Hawaii). Let me say that not a day goes by that I don't think of him. He was such a huge person (in mind, body and spirit) and his passing left a giant hole in everybody's life who knew him. I also want to say that I was blown away by the strength of your family. That day at your house is one I'll never forget. If you ever want to hear some Browski stories that maybe you haven't heard before (we all have them), feel free to reach out to us. Lots of love and shared sorrow, Noah & Gen

Tracy said...

Wow Wendy! I am so sorry! I hope that you continue to feel the love and support from those around you, and those of us that aren't.

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